the_commonplace

apparently torrent is the WORST FUCKING INVENTION FUCKING EVER! been downloading something for an hour and am 0.000000001% done. well actually i'm lying. it's 5.9% done. whooh boy. i think i might faint. i don't think it's worth my time staying up with it waiting for the fucking download, but i have shit else to do and sleeping is stupid when you can do it all day. and all i'm doing tomorrow is buying a mattress for davey and colleen's room. i can't wait to finally put the bed in there. their room will be like the bedroom i always wanted when i was a kid. so far for their room i have: a big rag rug, a barbie party record, a type-writers-in-cases-turned-bed-side-tables, several wizard of oz prints framed in black frames, big tan curtains complete with several little tasslely things, annnnnnnd an antique white brass bed! bestest room ever. lol. oh my god! i don't know why i didn't think of it before, but i am seriously putting in a canopy. ugh. fuck colleen and davey. they can have my room. :D yup great plan.

god damn. i forgot how stupid it was to write on this thing. actually i take that back. it wasn't stupid. it's stupid now though. i remember how much i used to write in this and be so excited if anyone ever commented on it. i remember thinking how boring it was to write on paper; how wrong it felt. now the keys under my fingers seem strange. the voice in my head rereading what i write as i write it sounds not like me at all. dunno. like the word 'dunno'. i NEVER use words like that in my journal. the internet doesn't feel like home any more. besides in my journal i can write shit like BONNIE LAUX IS A FAGGOT. not that i often do, but you know the choice is there and uh no ones going to say anything. :D not that if they did something i would give a fuck. and if you're not willing to take shit from people. why even be alive? ugh. this is fucking stupid. good bye livejournal. i've officially out grown whoring myself to your blogging stupidity... not that it's not cool for some people, but it's like livejournal and i were seeing each other and it's not me it's you. :O




ps: molly and or katy if you read this. i miss you guys and i'm so sorry i've been such a flake the last couple of years! i would love to talk to you again or email or whatever. :( lots of hugs and i'm sorrys, annie

meh.  school is school, but it was sorta fun catching up on it all.  let's see if i say that a few hours from now.  lol.  let's be more productive, shall we?

incrediatbly disappointed on how little i've been updating this lately.  i don't even have the excuse that i'm writing in my rl journal because i've lost it.  i'm so pissed that i did that.  it was a moleskin A MOLESKIN!!! 

bonnie and i went on a whirl wind road trip to illinois.  we could have been driving in circles as much as i paid attention to where we were and where we were going.  we just talked the whole time.  i'm not sure if we talked about the right things or i was just beating around the bush as i always do, but it felt good to talk and to have a enough to talk about with her.  

i missed out on a lot these last few years.   

so what can i say.  being home alone isn't as bad as i thought it would be.  i almost regret having to spend the night at colleen's last night which really i suppose wasn't entirely nessacary.  oh well.  having house to myself=win.  lol.  also it's 3:30 and i still haven't gotten the dishes done.  oh yeah i'm dragging this one out.  i dunno.  i'm having too enjoyment out of doing absolutely nothing. 

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!  my shirt!  my shirt is coming!!!  it left SPRINGFIELD, MA!!!  it's on it's way!!!  i'm so exicited.

so i decided my new year's resolution is going to be...  learn how to make a martini! 

i've watched teacher's pet a hundred times so i'm almost positive i can do it!  yaye! 

...now i just need some vermouth.

changed my journal's look.  meh.  i was bored.

My god, all i want to do is drink coffee and smoke cigarettes.

I ducked behind the drapes when I saw the moon begin to rise,
gathered in my loose ends switched off the light.
and down there in the dark I can see the real truth about me.
as clear as day, lord if I make it through tonight
then I will mend my ways and walk the straight path to the end of my days.

Oh, Mountain Goats, I'm unsecretly in love with you.

now you see me.
now you don't.
now you say you love me.
pretty soon you won't.

to say: IT'S MY 400TH POST!!!!

just posting.

me, sam, and ike made a christmas song playlist.

don't shoot me santa - the killers


silver and cold - afi


last christmas - jimmy eat world


wizard chess - harry and the potters


love like winter - afi


christmastime is here - charlie brown (my favorite christmas song)

OMG! CHARLIE BROWN KNOWNS MY PAIN!

baby please come home - death cab for cutie


a great big sled - the killers


making christmas - nightmare before christmas


MERRY CHRISTMAS.

sigh.  once again ... up all night ... for no reason.  seriously this has to stop, but then again i don't really care.  so listening to peter, paul, and mary while playing bubble spinner and reading dethklok fics.  somehow this seems wrong.  wrong i tell you.  ugh.  i want a cigarette, but it's just so fucking cold out.  grr.  decisions.  i am lame at making them.  what about pp&m makes me want to shave my head and join a commune?  lol.  shaving your head really isn't hippie-ish, but whatever.  oh god.  i would look awful without any hair. 

'And I went, too, only back to the land, back to all blackness lit up by like odd dreams which I didn't know whether they were dreams or not, O my brothers.'  -A Clockwork Orange

everything's peachy.

ddjdfkkksdfkliiiijkdefjklasdfjkldjklkdjlllllldkgfdasdilllllllghagowhiammmaihgnvladnglsdljasglhaslgheeelashghaglhaioeiiiishhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... 


and also lame.  ._.  ugh.  boredom always follows.  >.<

there's snow outside and i have no idea how i'm getting home.

i don't think i bought anything on buy nothing day...  but not on purpose.  oops.  lol.  oh well.  that's alright.  i still feel good about it.  also, 

We stank of hair dye and ammonia.
We sealed ourselves away from view.
You were looking at the void and sat unblinking.
The best that i could do was to train my eyes on you.

We scaled the hidden hills beneath the surface,
Scraped our fingers bloody on the stones.
And built our little house that we could live in
Out of dinu lapatti's bones.

We kept our friends at bay all summer long.
Treated the days as if they'd kill us if they could.
Ringing out the hours like blood drenched bed sheets
To keep winter time at bay but december showed up anyway.

There was no money it was money that you wanted.
I went downtown, sold off most of what i owned.
And we raised a tower to broadcast all our dark dreams
From dinu lapatti's bones.

probably the worst kind of slash i have ever loved.  ever. 




buuuut it's so adorable!!!!  PICTURES!


squeeee!


also, fandom that loves using bad grammar and adding 's' to things more than i do(!)

i've missed everything.  oh god.  i feel like an expolded pimple or something.  everything the last few months has been so soul-numbing and degrading.  this mild depression or whatever i would like to call it has turned the world blurry and dull.  i miss looking at things and talking about important things not bullshit politics or fucking jon and colleen.  i'm done with all of it.  i want to be myself again.  i want to think smoking a cigarette is the most heavenly experience in existence.  i want to get out of the stupid rut i'm in and stop all the stupid things i've been invovled in.  I'M WASTING AWAY HERE.  i hate this entry, but i don't fucking care i have to say something.  i want my room to be clean.  i want to read a fucking book.  i HATE MY CLOTHING.  IT ALL LOOKS LIKE STUPID JUNK PILE INDIE SHIT.  grrr....  this doesn't feel like it changes anything.  but my eyes do feel wider. 

oh i have forgotten how much i love the interweb and the livejournal.  well mostly i have just missed the fanfics ...and i think my large self-enduced break from them has made me appercate them more.  i'm getting that warm fuzzy feeling back again instead of that gross stomach-twisting dread one.  yeah.  lol. 

so ima go look at more slash now... :D